Facebook
by RoxasSerenity
Summary: I pretty much wrote this because I can. Yep, I kept going, I'm having way too much fun not to. The random banters of facebook. Spoilers for IM2 XD. Rated for mentions of violence. PLEASE review. Now an Avengers/CSI crossover. COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

_Who doesnt love facebook? This was inspired by the fact that my inbox is being clogged by my best friend and her boyfriend flirting over a photo that I tagged them in. I am very tempted to continue this. Drop a review, let me know what you think._

_SPOILERS: Set after IM2 so expect them._

_DISCLAIMER: I own neither Iron Man or Facebook. If only..._

**Tony Stark is in a relationship with Virginia "Pepper" Potts**

_10 people like this._

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Hang on, I didnt approve that. STARK, your ass better not have hacked my account again

Tony Stark: How could it have been me? I've been with you and the board all afternoon

James Rhodes: You're having a lovers spat already? What's it been? Two days?

Tony Stark: Go to hell Rhodey.

Natasha Romanoff: I really WAS kidding about the honeymoon. When did this happen?

James Rhodes: They were making out on one of the roof's after Tony saved Pepper from an eploding Hammer drone.

Natasha Romanoff: Really?

Natasha Romanoff: Hang on, how do YOU know that?

James Rhodes: Tony decided to land on the same roof that I was already on.

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts is tempted to castrate Tony Stark with a rusty spoon**

_Natasha Romanoff likes this._

Tony Stark: I didnt do anything I swear!

**JARVIS would probably have a headache if he wasn't a computer**

Harold Hogan: You're the lucky one Jarvis

Tony Stark: Since when are you on facebook Jarvis? And WHY?

JARVIS: I have found that it is a simple way to communicate with you after you mute me for passing on advise sir

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts is single**

James Rhodes: You broke you ALREADY?

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Don't make me find my spoon James.

James Rhodes: *Squirms*

**Tony Starks wants a kiss**

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: I'm sure I have Christine's number somewhere

Tony Stark: But I don't want her number

**Tony Stark wants a kiss from Virginia "Pepper" Potts**

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts is tempted to borrow Natasha Romanoff's gun**

_Natasha Romanoff likes this_

Harold Hogan: Please don't encourage her Nat

JARVIS: I agree with Mr Hogan. I estimate that Miss Potts is 78% likely to actually shoot Mr Stark

Tony Stark: I don't like that. Where's the dislike button?

**Natasha Romanoff is tempted to lock Virginia "Pepper" Potts and Tony Stark in the closet**

_Harold Hogan and James Rhodes like this_

Tony Stark: Oh, your ass is fired. Again

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: No she isn't

Tony Stark: You aren't CEO anymore, I can do what I want

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Natasha is MY PA. You can't fire her unless you fire me

Tony Stark: Who's idea was that?

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Yours

Tony Stark: Dammit

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: XD

Natasha Romanoff: Are you SURE you aren't secretly married? Cause you argue like you are

Tony Stark: WHAT!

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: WHAT!

Harold Hogan: *high fives Natasha*

Natasha Romanoff: *receives high five from Happy*

**Tony Stark is firing both Harold Hogan and Natasha Hogan**

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: No you're not

Tony Stark: Why not?

**Harold Hogans wants ice cream**

_Natasha Romanoff likes this_

Natasha Romanoff: Nice subject change

Harold Hogan: Thank you. Not that it will shut them up.

Natasha Romanoff: I'm thinking alcohol and Vegas

Harold Hogan: XD

Harold Hogan: You...wanna wanna go for ice cream?

Natasha Romanoff: Sure

**JARVIS wants a fire extinguisher**

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Why do you need a fire extinguisher Jarvis?

JARVIS: I was hoping to cool you and Mr Stark down Miss Potts

James Rhodes: TOLD!

**Tony Stark wants to borrow Natasha Romanoff's gun**


	2. Chapter 2

_I had so much fun writing Chapter 1 that I HAD to keep going with this. I am on a ROLE people! I'M laughing as the ideas come into my head and I really hope you do too. I'm also heading towards Happy and Natasha relationship as the last few lines will tell you. Please Review!_

(................................................)

**Harold Hogan has brain freeze**

_Tony Stark likes this_

Harold Hogan: It hurts!

Natasha Romanoff: Try not showing off next time

Harold Hogan: It seemed like a good idea at the time. I didnt like the way that guy was drooling over you

Natasha Romanoff: He was with his kids. AND WIFE!

Harold Hogan: Last time I checked, your ass wasnt part of his wife's anatomy

Tony Stark: Ha ha. Happy was checking out Nat's ass

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: And you werent

Tony Stark: My eyes are on one ass and it dont belong to Natasha

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts thinks Tony Stark is a pervert**

_Natasha Romanoff, Harold Hogan and JARVIS like this_

Tony Stark: Come on Pep

JARVIS: I believe Miss Potts may have a point sir. You do have a tendancy to look at certain parts of her anatomy without consent

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Thank you Jarvis

JARVIS: You are welcome Miss Potts

Tony Stark: My PA and AI are ganging up on me? What the hell did I do wrong?

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Shall I answer chronologically or alphabetically?

Tony Stark: Thats the last time you watch Sherlock Holmes

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: You cant take Jude Law away from him!

Tony Stark: Can and will

**James Rhodes liked it better when Tony Stark and Virginia "Pepper" Potts were making out on the roof**

_Harold Hogan and Natasha Romanoff like this_

Tony Stark: And Pepper thinks I'm perverted

James Rhodes: At least it shut you both up

Tony Stark: How about I shut YOU up?

Harold Hogan: Children, please

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts feels like Chinese**

_Tony Stark likes this_

**Tony Stark wants Virginia "Pepper" Potts**

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts thinks Tony Stark should buy her dinner first**

_Natasha Romanoff likes this_

Tony Stark: Is that a date?

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: I'm inviting Nat, Happy and Rhodey. So no

Tony Stark: AWW! Come on Pep, throw me a bone here

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: I'm throwing the bill at you instead. If I throw a bone you have grounds to sue me

Harold Hogan: Pepper is telling jokes and a promise of free food. I am SO there

Natasha Romanoff: I second that.

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: He should be happy I didnt invite Fury

Natasha Romanoff: You are SO mean Pepper. I like that

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: :D

**Tony Stark hates the women in his life**

**Harold Hogan likes it that Virginia "Pepper" Potts has found a way to pop Tony Stark's ego**

_Virginia "Pepper" Potts and Natasha Romanoff like this_

**Tony Stark thinks that Harold Hogan is sucking up to get in Natasha Romanoff's pants**

**Natasha Romanoff thinks that Harold Hogan has a better chance of getting into my pants than Tony Stark does getting into Virginia "Pepper" Potts's**

**Harold Hogan is in desperate need of some ice**


	3. Chapter 3

_I'm on such a role with this, I could actually have ANOTHER chapter done before bed! _:D _Seriously, this is WAY too much fun_

(..........................................................)

**James Rhodes is dreaming of a white Christmas**

Tony Stark: Its the middle of summer

James Rhodes: I was aware of that

Harold Hogan: We live in Malibu

James Rhodes: I was aware of that too.

**Nick Fury wants a word with you Tony Stark**

**Tony Stark is tempted to show Nick Fury where to shove his eye patch**

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts is tempted to drill a hole in Tony Stark's head**

_Natasha Romanoff likes this_

Harold Hogan: You are a REALLY bad influence Natasha

Natasha Romanoff: Like she needs the encouragement

**Natasha Romanoff would like to beat some common sense into Tony Stark**

_Virginia "Pepper" Potts likes this_

Tony Stark: What the hell? What has gotten into you two?

**Harold Hogan wants the fighting to stop. And a frozen coke**

_4 people like this_

Natasha Romanoff: Still havent learned your lesson Happy?

Harold Hogan: Nope. There's a frozen coke with my name on it. Wanna come?

**Natasha Romanoff is going out for frozen coke with Harold Hogan**

_Harold Hogan likes this_

**James Rhodes thinks something sus is going on**

Tony Stark: Really?

James Rhodes: You didnt notice?

Tony Stark: I was being sarcastic

**Tony Stark thinks James Rhodes needs a girlfriend**

**James Rhodes thinks Tony Stark is a duece**

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts thinks Tony Stark and James Rhodes need to grow up**

_Natasha Romanoff and Harold Hogan like this_

**Tony Stark wants a kiss from Virginia "Pepper" Potts for hurting his feelings**

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts thinks Tony Stark is immature and should screw himself**

_Natasha Romanoff and Harold Hogan like this_

Tony Stark: I didnt know you capable of such words Pepper

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: You're just lucky all in one piece and I'm not filing a lawsuit for SEXUAL HARASSMENT!

Tony Stark: Its been three weeks!

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: I'm still cleaning up YOUR mess

Tony Stark: Technically, its Hammer's mess. He bailed Vanko, not me

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Dont care. The words coming out of your mouth are the reason I've been wearing pants since we got back

**JARVIS wishes someone would make it stop**

_4 people like this_

**Steve Rogers thinks Tony Stark should shove his tongue down Virginia "Pepper" Potts's throat and put us all out of our misery**

_15 people like this_

**Steve Rogers has been blocked by Tony Stark and Virginia "Pepper" Potts**

**Peter Parker is tempted to wrap them together in webbing and MAKE them confront their feelings**

**Peter Parker has been blocked by Tony Stark and Virginia "Pepper" Potts**

**Natasha Romanoff thinks she likes her job and Harold Hogan too much to raise an opinion on Steve Rogers and Peter Parker being blocked by Tony Stark and Virginia "Pepper" Potts**

_Virginia "Pepper" Potts and Tony Stark like this_

**Harold Hogan likes Natasha Romanoff too**

_Natasha Romanoff likes this_

**James Rhodes thinks Harold Hogan and Natasha Romanoff should get a room**

**James Rhodes has been blocked by Harold Hogan and Natasha Romanoff**

_Tony Stark likes this_


	4. Chapter 4

_I have never had this much fun in my LIFE! I really hope to keep going with this for a while. I'm LOVING IT! There's a lot of Rhodey bashing in this and I really dont know why. Its too late now, but I forgot to mention mentioning Steve Rogers and Peter Parker aka Captain America and Spiderman (if you dont know which is which, you are very deprived) in the last chapter. Sorry. And I'm loving that you people LOVE THIS STORY! For your viewing (coughandreviewingcough) pleasure._

_ENJOY!_

**(..................................................)**

**Tony Stark is seeing red**

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Stop staring at your suit then

Tony Stark: I'm dying on the inside

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: It'll give me one less thing to worry about

Tony Stark: Thats not even funny

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: I'm laughing

**James Rhodes thinks Steve Rogers and Peter Parker were right**

**James Rhodes has been blocked by Virginia "Pepper" Potts and Tony Stark**

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts wants to know where her shoes went and is looking at Tony Stark**

JARVIS: Your shoes are currently being hidden in Mr Stark's personal shower Miss Potts

Tony Stark: Snitch

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Thank you Jarvis

JARVIS: You're welcome Miss Potts

**Tony Stark thinks JARVIS is a snitch**

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts thinks Tony Stark needs to grow up and stop hiding my stuff**

**Tony Stark thinks Virginia "Pepper" Potts should kiss him**

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts just broke Tony Stark's nose**

_5 people like this_

Tony Stark: I cant get my nose to stop bleeding

Harold Hogan: You ACTUALLY broke his nose? Way to go Pepper.

Natasha Romanoff: I thought I was the bad influence Happy?

Harold Hogan: You are. Your bad influence is encouraging me to encourage Pepper to beat the snot out of Tony

Natasha Romanoff: :D

Tony Stark: Guys, I seriously cant get my nose to stop bleeding

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Tilt your head back and pinch your nose

Tony Stark: WHAT DO YOU THINK I'VE BEEN DOING?

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: No need to be hostle

Tony Stark: You were the one who broke my nose in the first place!

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: You were being an ass!

JARVIS: Miss Potts, may I please request that you assist in helping Mr Stark in stopping his bleeding nose

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: If I absolutely HAVE to

**Natasha Romanoff had a really good time at the movies with Harold Hogan last night**

_Harold Hogan likes this_

Harold Hogan: I enjoyed last night too :) Maybe...we can do it again some time

Natasha Romanoff: I'd like that

James Rhodes: AWW! Love over facebook

**James Rhodes has been blocked by Natasha Romanoff and Harold Hogan**

James Rhodes: OH COME ON!

**JARVIS is witnessing Tony Stark and Virginia "Pepper" Potts kissing**

_27 people like this_

Harold Hogan: WHOOP!

Natasha Romanoff: $50 says they're engaged in six months

Harold Hogan: $100 says its sooner

Natasha Romanoff: You're on Hogan

**Tony Stark is tempted to rewrite JARVIS's learning program**

**JARVIS likes how quiet it is when Virginia "Pepper" Potts shuts Tony Stark up with her mouth **

_4 people like this_

James Rhodes: They better not be doing that all the time. I was supposed to come over this weekend

**James Rhodes has been blocked by JARVIS**

James Rhodes: This seriously isnt funny anymore


	5. Chapter 5

_The great thing about Facebook is that its an endless stream of inspiration and it never gets old. __**Armitage Blade **__was hoping for Bruce to show up so this one's for you. I even got Grissom, Sara and Catherine in there. The response to this is better than I expected so thank you. You guys keep me writing. I love you all!_

(...............................................)

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts REALLY wants to borrow Natasha Romanoff's gun**

_Natasha Romanoff likes this_

Tony Stark: It was an accident!

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Dont care. Not talking to you

Harold Hogan: What he do this time?

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: He blew up my car!

Tony Stark: IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: I DONT CARE! YOU BLEW UP MY CAR!

Harold Hogan: HA HA HA!

Harold Hogan: Wait? Seriously?

JARVIS: Mr Stark has indeed blown up Miss Potts's car

Harold Hogan: It was nice knowing you Tony

Tony Stark: Why doesnt anyone believe me?

Harold Hogan: Because you have the tendancy to blow things up

**Nick Fury wants his gun back**

**Tony Stark fears for his life**

_Virginia "Pepper" Potts and Natasha Romanoff like this_

**Natasha Romanoff is in a relationship with Harold Hogan**

_8 people like this_

Tony Stark: Happy and Natasha sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G

Harold Hogan: At least I'm kissing someone and my girlfriend doesnt hate me!

Natasha Romanoff: XD

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts is single**

_Natasha Romanoff likes this_

Harold Hogan: Told and rejected. HA!

Tony Stark: Shove it Hogan

**JARVIS thinks Tony Stark and Virginia "Pepper" Potts are in denial**

_18 people like this _

**JARVIS has been blocked by Tony Stark**

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Unblock Jarvis Tony

Tony Stark: Did you read his status?

**Tony Stark has been blocked by Virginia "Pepper" Potts**

Harold Hogan: It just keeps getting better! ROFL!

Natasha Romanoff: XD

**Tony Stark is now friends with JARVIS**

_Virginia "Pepper" Potts likes this_

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts is now friends with Tony Stark**

_Tony Stark likes this_

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Dont get too excited

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts is now friends with Sara Sidle**

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: What the...? Who are you engaged to?

Sara Sidle: What? Oh, I forgot to change that. Hold on.

**Sara Sidle is married**

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: WHO TO WOMAN?

Sara Sidle: Give him a minute. Poor guy hasnt figured out facebook yet

**Sara Sidle is married to Gilbert Grissom**

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: WHAT? Where the hell was I when this happened?

Gilbert Grissom: Got me. But I know where I was :D

Catherine Willows: You ELOPED!

Gilbert Grissom: Damn right I did.

Catherine Willows: I hate you! Your ass is dead

Sara Sidle: Hey! Get away from my husband's ass! I aint sharing!

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: *blink*

Tony Stark: You have some WEIRD friends Pepper

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Dont make me block you again

Tony Stark: I'll be good now

**Bruce Banner thinks its hammer time**

_Ben Grimm like this_

Tony Stark: Shouldnt it be clobbering time

Ben Grimm: Thats my line. I had it copyrighted and everything

Tony Stark: I didnt know you could do that

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Dont even think about it Tony

Tony Stark: Can I have a kiss?

**Tony Stark has been blocked by Virginia "Pepper" Potts**


	6. Chapter 6

_I just noticed how AU this is becoming. Who cares though, right? Some zgiggly fun bashing of Christine Everhart and Hank Pettigrew because they're both evil and hated by all. LOL. Going for another update record. Wish me luck! A Twitter mention too. _:D

(.................................................)

**Tony Stark is in the bathroom**

Ben Grimm: We didnt need to know that

Bruce Banner: I thought random stuff was for Twitter

**James Rhodes needs some ice**

**Tony Stark thinks no one cares what James Rhodes needs**

**Sara Sidle thinks that last night's Chinese didnt agree with her**

Gilbert Grissom: Honey, you need anything?

Sara Sidle: Lemonade and saltine crackers

Tony Stark: Shouldnt you be WITH her if she's ill?

Gilbert Grissom: I'm at the supermarket genious

Tony Stark: Why not ask BEFORE you leave?

Gilbert Grissom: Oh yeah, she was hugging the toilet most of last night so as soon as she falls asleep, I'll wake her up and ask what she needs from the store. I thought you were SUPPOSED to be smart

**Gilbert Grissom is no longer confused as to why Tony Stark has never been married**

_7 people like this_

Sara Sidle: Stop arguing with Tony. I need you back before I become best friends with the damn toilet

Gilbert Grissom: Yes dear

Tony Stark: Told by the missus. LOL

**Tony Stark has been blocked by Gilbert Grissom**

_Virginia "Pepper" Potts likes this_

Sara Sidle: GILBERT! GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE RIGHT NOW!

**Harold Hogan could quite possibly be in love**

_Natasha Romanoff likes this_

Natasha Romanoff: I love you too Happy

**Harold Hogan can feel his insides going gooey**

_Natasha Romanoff likes this_

**Christine Everhart wants the 411 on Natasha Romanoff and Harold Hogan's relationship**

**Christine Everhart has been blocked by Harold Hogan**

**Christine Everhart has been blocked by Natasha Romanoff**

_**15 related stories**_

**Hank Pettigrew wants to talk to Sara Sidle**

**Gilbert Grissom thinks Hank Pettigrew should go f**k himself**

_Sara Sidle likes this_

Hank Pettigrew: Since when is Sara's personal life YOUR concern?

Gilbert Grissom: Since thats MY ring on HER finger jackass

Gregory Sanders: TOLD! (high fives Grissom)

**Steve Rogers is going to kill Hank Pettigrew for the stunt he pulled**

_745 people like this_

Sara Sidle: Be my guest

Ben Grimm: Clobbering time?

Steve Rogers: Yep. Wanna join me?

Ben Grimm: Hell yes!

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts is in a relatioship with JARVIS**

_18 people like this_

Tony Stark: WHAT!

Bruce Banner: Jealous?

Tony Stark: My PA is IN A RELATIONSHIP with my AI! Does no on else find this wrong?

Bruce Banner: No

Ben Grimm: No

Steve Rogers: No

Sara Sidle: Nope

Gilbert Grissom: Not really

Tony Stark: There is something SERIOUSLY wrong with you people.

Gilbert Grissom: If she's happy, who are you to judge her?

Steve Rogers: Gilbert Grissom 1....

Bruce Banner: Iron Man 0

Tony Stark: You dont even KNOW him?

**Gilbert Grissom is now friends with Steve Rogers**

_Virginia "Pepper" Potts and Natasha Romanoff like this_

Steve Rogers: You were saying?

Tony Stark: Why am I hated so much?

Steve Rogers: That is retorical, right?


	7. Chapter 7

_It should be a crime but I'm ACTUALLY running out of ideas. AHH! The first facebook group mentioned actually exists because I am actually a member of said froup, having been in Perth, WA on 22/3/2010 when the storm hit. The irony of it is that, just before the power went out, I was watching 2012. LOL_

_ENJOY AND REVIEW! I LOVE YOU ALL!_

**Tony Stark has joined the group "I survived the Great Storm of Perth 22/3/2010"**

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: You've never been to Perth Tony.

Tony Stark: How do you know?

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Because you've never been to AUSTRALIA

Tony Stark: Who cares? Hey, there's 52, 754 people in this group and I bet not all of them were there for it.

Tony Stark: HA! There's even a group for people who DIDNT survive

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Thats not even funny Tony

Tony Stark: Its a joke group Potts, no one ACTULLY died

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Dont care. Its still not funny

**Natasha Romanoff wants to lock Tony Stark and Virginia "Pepper" Potts in the bathroom again**

_57 people like this_

**Tony Stark thinks Natasha Romanoff should find Harold Hogan, a room and stay out of his business**

Natasha Romanoff: Already got both

**Harold Hogan is suffercating from the sexual tension between Tony Stark and Virginia "Pepper" Potts**

**Tony Stark thinks Harold Hogan isnt having enough sex with Natasha Romanoff as they both have too much time to butt into his business**

**Harold Hogan knows where Natasha Romanoff keeps her gun**

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts thinks she needs to escape the testostrone**

_Natasha Romanoff likes this_

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: I know where Tony leaves his wallet. Wanna come with?

Natasha Romanoff: Come pick me up in twenty minutes

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: =D

**Bruce Banner wants a donut**

**Tony Stark and Virginia "Pepper" Potts were tagged in a photo "Love in the bathroom"**

_82 people like this_

Tony Stark: What the hell? JOHNNY! Where the hell did you get this?

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: Simple answer? Jarvis

Tony Stark: Why the hell would you post that on facebook?

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: Because its THIS sort of stuff that you should be doing, not b*tching at each other like cats in a sack

Ben Grimm: Damn Johnny, for once you're being a duece about romance

Johnny "The HumanTorch" Storm: Are you kidding? If they have their tongues down each others throats, they both shut up

Susan Storm: Way to ruin the moment Johnny

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: Thats what I live for

**Gilbert Grissom wants to thank Sara Sidle for talking him into joining facebook**

_Sara Sidle likes this_

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Its not THAT good Gil

Gilbert Grissom: Are you kidding me? Your conversations are WAY better than listening to Catherine complain about missing the wedding. Three months and she STILL wont shut up about it

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: You eloped. You cant say you didnt expect it

Gilbert Grissom: I'm the happiest I've been in years. If Cath thinks its wrong, she can sue me

**Sara Sidle wants Gilbert Grissom to come home so I can kiss him senseless**

**Gilbert Grissom is running to the car as we speak**

_Sara Sidle likes this_

Tony Stark: At least SOMEONE's getting laid tonight

Sara Sidle: Damn right he is

**Nick Fury wants to know why he's only just found out about Natasha Romanoff and Harold Hogan**

Natasha Romanoff: Got me, its not like we've been hiding it

**Harold Hogan is in love with Natasha Romanoff and thinks Nick Fury can go to hell**

_15 people like this_

Tony Stark: WHOOP! Hogan has balls!

Natasha Romanoff: Knows how to use 'em too

Tony Stark: TMI Nat

Natasha Romanoff: I can say what I want Stark :P

Steve Rogers: Happy told Fury where to stick it? Harold Hogan, you are OFFICIALLY my hero!

Bruce Banner: Dude, not even the HULK would have enough to have a go at Fury

**Tony Stark has invited you to join "24/5/2010, the day Harold Hogan started a war against Nick Fury. And won"**

_**187 people have joined this group**_


	8. Chapter 8

_Yep, still going. Decided to go a bit nuts, for **its and giggles. To set the scene, the guys went out for a day in Malibu and the photos are now on facebook. Grissom has also created a group, inspired by the Great Perth storm one, mentioned inthe previous chapter. If confused, The photos they're talking about will be explained at the end. I'd recommend starting at the beginning and reading until the end though._

XD

(...)

**Gilbert Grissom has created a group "I survived a day with Tony Stark"**

_**15 people have joined this group**_

Tony Stark: Come on Gil, it wasnt THAT bad

Gilbert Grissom: Steve almost took my head off because you couldnt keep your mouth shut!

Tony Stark: We had fun though

Gilbert Grissom: I guess...

Sara Sidle: You tried to give me a sausage roll

Tony Stark: You said you were hungry!

Sara Sidle: I'M A VEGETARIAN!

Tony Stark: You didnt tell ME that!

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Yes she did. So did Gil. FOUR TIMES! And Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm, you own me a new pair of jeans and sneakers

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: I know! Can I guess that your the same size as Sue? Just as a reference

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: About yeah. Buy me skinnys and your ass is getting thrown in Tony's pool.

Steve Rogers: I really am sorry about the frisbee thing Gil

Gilbert Grissom: Dont worry about it Steve. I'd have tried to take Tony's head off too

Tony Stark: Is it "Pick on Tony day" or something?

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Did you read the title of the group Tony?

Steve Rogers: If he did that, he wouldnt have joined this group Pepper

Tony Stark: The only way to read what's being written is to join the damn thing

Gilbert Grissom: Curiousity killed the cat

**10 people were tagged in the album "Surviving a Day with Tony Stark"**

Tony Stark: Tell me that isnt...

Bruce Banner: Oh come on!

Sara Sidle: What? There's nothing wrong with that

Tony Stark: You arent complaining cause you were doing it the entire time

Sara Sidle: WAS NOT!

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: They're only kissing Tony, its not THAT bad

Tony Stark: ITS ON FACEBOOK!

Tony Stark: GREAT! Now its Happy's profile picture

Steve Rogers: You werent complaining when Johnny posted that picture of you and Pepper

Bruce Banner: TOLD!

Catherine Willows: The photo of Sara and Gil is really cute

Sara Sidle: I just found my profile picture. Thanks Cath

Catherine Willows: If Ecklie was being so tight, I would have had Swing shadow and come down to Malibu

Gilbert Grissom: Who took this? Its really good.

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: I did =)

Gregory Sanders: You look real happy Sara

Sara Sidle: I am Greg

Gregory Sanders: Glad to hear that

Peter Parker: Why is Pepper on Tony's back?

Bruce Banner: Tony stole her phone and Pepper couldnt think of another way to get it back

Steve Rogers: HA! Complain about THIS photo Tony!

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: When was this taken?

Bruce Banner: Tony got you off his back, you tripped him up, he landed on top of you and this happened

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: That doesnt explain why its on facebook

Peter Parker: It was a Kodak moment?

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: GROUP PHOTO!

Tony Stark: Should we have an Avengers page? We can use this photo

Nick Fury: Your not part of the Avengers Iron Man

**Nick Fury has been blocked by Tony Stark**

Gregory Sanders: Grissom and Sara sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G

Gilbert Grissom: I will kiss my wife when and where I like Sanders

Steve Rogers: TOLD!

Gregory Sanders: Your new profile picture is of you kssing and GROPING my BEST FRIEND! WTF?

Nicky Stokes: I think I can see tongue

**Gregory Sanders needs something to gauge his eyes out with**

**(...)**

_Photo 1 is Happy and Natasha kissing (which ironically becomes Happy's profile pic (No, I wasnt joking about that))_

_Photo 2 is Grissom kissing Sara's cheek with his arms wrapped around her from behind and her eyes are closed (Does that make sense)_

_Photo 3 is Pepper on Tony's back, attempting to grab her phone_

_Photo 4 is Tony is layed on top if Pepper IN THE GRASS and their making out_

_Photo 5 is (obviously) a GROUP PHOTO! And..._

_Photo 6 is Grissom and Sara making out_

_These are what I had in mind when I wrote this. If that doesnt make sense, let me know_


	9. Chapter 9

_There are a few shout outs in this here chapter. The first is a kind of tie in with my 'Beiber fever' series because the little s*** is annoying. There is a mention on my opinion on the Rocky Horror Show, World of Warcraft gets mentioned and there's a shout out to my BFF Dani, who will probably never read this (the bite bit) I'm calling it a night. Hope you Americans have a g'day_

(...)

**Tony Stark is going to KILL Justin F****ING Beiber if it means getting Virginia "Pepper" Potts back**

_19 people like this_

Gilbert Grissom: If you werent so rich, I'd pay you to do it

Tony Stark: Please, dont say it...

Gilbert Grissom: Sara has Beiber fever

Tony Stark: NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Peter Parker: All hope is lost if Sara AND Pepper are infected

Tony Stark: No, not MJ too

Peter Park: No, thank God

Tony Stark: Then we have a little hope

Gilbert Grissom: NO! For all we know, this thing could be contagious

Natasha Romanoff: OMG this is hilarious! You're fighting for your loved ones against a 16 year old! ROFL!

Tony Stark: This is funny Nat, this is serious

Harold Hogan: I have to agree with Nat on this one. This is more entertaining than watching Team Edward and Team Jacob fans trying to kill each other

Tony Stark: What?

Natasha Romanoff: We went to Comic Con last week

Harold Hogan: Should have been there man, it was hilarious!

Peter Parker: Its on YouTube somewhere.

Peter Parker: What? I collect comic books

**JARVIS really wants this song to end**

Tony Stark: Whats the replay count at now Jarvis?

JARVIS: 12 sir

Gilbert Grissom: This is really serious Tony

Tony Stark: I thought she had OCD but thats just plain ridiculous

Catherine Willows: I was worried about Lindsay but she actually seemed REPULSED by the kid

Tony Stark: One soul has been saved. Hallujah!

**Harold Hogan is seriously disturbed**

Gilbert Grissom: Should we be concerned?

Natasha Romanoff: We just finished watching "The Rocking Horror Show"

Peter Parker: That movie always freaks me out, no matter HOW many times I see it

Gilbert Grissom: You're not the only one Pete

Steve Rogers: Whats the Rocky Horror Show?

**Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm senses a movie night is in order**

_4 people like this_

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: I nominate Tony's house

Tony Stark: Cant place is still under construction

Bruce Banner: Where have you been sleeping then?

Tony Stark: Moved the bed into the basement

Steve Rogers: Bet that didnt go down well with Pepper

Tony Stark: It didnt, not much I can do about it though until I get my room back

**James Rhodes is OFFICIALLY on WOW**

_6 people like this_

Tony Stark: I've been pestering you for months

James Rhodes: Been doing stuff, havent had time until now

Steve Rogers: HELLO? Been in deep freeze for 60 years! What are you talking about?

Gilbert Grissom: Its a computer game

James Rhodes: Its not JUST a computer game Gil

Tony Stark: Yeah, its THE ULTIMATE GAME!

Gilbert Grissom: Hey, I'm old, what do I know?

Sara Grissom: Are not!

Gilbert Grissom: What the...? When did you change your name?

Sara Grissom: Got the papers this morning! I am OFFICIALLY Sara Grissom!

**Gilbert Grissom wishes for him and his wife to not be disturbed!**

Catherine Willows: I have CLEARLY missed something BIG

Steve Rogers: Sara finally changed her name

Catherine Willows: Cool!

Gregory Sanders: Dont call Cath. Last time someone disturbed them, Grissom threw his phone out of the window.

**Tony Stark will shoot someone if that damn plays one more time**

James Rhodes: BABY, BABY, BABY OH!

**James Rhodes has been blocked by Tony Stark**

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts has a headache**

Tony Stark: Top left shelf in the bathroom

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Thank you

Tony Stark: Have you eaten?

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Not really

Tony Stark: Pepper!

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Bite me Stark

Bruce Banner: Dont say that Pep, he'll actually take you up on it

Tony Stark: Too late

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Thanks Stark, I have teeth marks in my shoulder

Tony Stark: Any time Potts

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts has just broken Tony Stark's nose. Again.**

_22 people like this_


	10. Chapter 10

_Ok, so the idea of Wedges has been floating around in my head since Lab Rats way back in CSI season 7. THEN of course was THE MOMENT in Field Mice (which is the only part of the episode that I've seen). The original idea is still incomplete on my hard drive but I'll finish it. Eventually. I'm thinking about changing this to an Avengers/CSI crossover, cause that is technically what its turned into._

_This is more fluffy/romantic than the other chapters but dont threat, there is humor at the end. I think. _

_Being a CSI/Wedges chapter EXPECT SPOILERS FOR FILED MICE! Being up later than usual, also dont expect as many updates as usual. I pray no one is losing their job because of this story too_

(...)

**Wendy Simms thinks David Hodges is a tool**

_14 people like this_

Mandy Webster: Theres a tub of choc chip in the freezer

Wendy Simms: Throw in a DVD and a pick-me-up and its a date

David "SuperDave" Phillips: How about the ENTIRE Star Wars series? I cant come but feel free to borrow them

Wendy Simms: You're the best Dave :)

**Henry Andrews thinks David Hodges is a d*ckhead**

_18 people like this_

David Hodges: Whats with all the abuse?

Henry Andrews: YOU GLUED ME TO MY LOCKER!

David Hodges: No need to shout

Henry Andrews: I didnt, caps lock got stuck

**You have one new message from Wendy Simms**

I know you thought you were doing the right thing David but I cant deal with the guilt of getting you in trouble

**You have one new message from David Hodges**

You didnt Wendy, I didnt want YOU to get in trouble. Besides, do you really think people would BELIEVE that you did all those things to Henry? Hell, I didnt until you came into my lab with your hands in your pockets. You dont feel guilty, ok?

**You have one new message from Wendy Simms**

I guess. Youwannaseeamoviesometime?

**You have one new message from David Hodges**

You forget how the space bar works? That was a joke. I'm being immature again. Sorry. I'm just a little confused though, I thought this wouldnt happen

**You have one new message from Wendy Simms**

Maybe snorting ice cream while Leia says 'I love you' to Han made me realize that maybe I want what I know I shouldnt have

**You have one new message from David Hodges**

Something tells me Grissom was right. If this is really going to happen and I have to change shift, you're worth it. You always were, even if I was too stupid to see it

**You have one new message from Mandy Webster**

Way to go genious. Its bad enough you trashed her date with Henry, she just ran out of here, more than likely in tears. What the hell did you say to her?

88888*********888888888888

Hodges frowned at the screen. He'd upset her _again_? He was just about to type a response when there was a hesitant knock on the door.

"Wendy? But Mandy said..." He'd barely begun to speak when that mint choc chip flavored mouth latched itself on to its own, to which he uncharactistically groaned. She pried his lips open, tasting beer and salted peanuts as her tongue ran seductively over his. Not even the small cry from behind them could pop their bubble.

"EWW!"

"Nathan! Be quiet!"

"But mum! She's giving him cooties!"

Wendy laughed into Hodges's mouth, reluctantly pulling away. Brown eyes met blue as Hodges found her hand, threading his fingers through hers and marvelling at how perfectly they fit together. Without a single thought about the child or mother stood meters away, Hodges placed a lingering kiss on Wendy's lips, gently pulling her into the apartment.

(...)

**Catherine Willows is concerned. Has anyone heard from Wendy Simms?**

Mandy Webster: We were watching a movie when Wendy ran out of the apartment. I havent seen her since and she isnt answering her phone

David "SuperDave" Phillips: I kind of know where she is. But you're not going to believe me

Catherine Willows: I need to know thats she alright Dave

David "SuperDave" Phillips: I was going to see my sister-in-law with the wife when I saw...

Catherine Willows: David

David "SuperDave" Phillips: Isawwendykissinghodges

Henry Andrews: Please tell me I'm miss reading that

Mandy Webster: Not unless we all are

Henry Andrews: First he tortures me, then he wrecks my date with Wendy, now he's KISSING HER!

David "SuperDave" Phillips: Actually, she kissed him

Gregory Sanders: In all honesty, you never actually had a chance with Wendy

Henry Andrews: Thank you, I feel LOADS better

Gregory Sanders: You're welcome

Henry Andrews: I was being sarcastic

Gregory Sanders: Duh!

Sara Grissom: Hodges and Wendy FINALLY hooked up

Henry Andrews: Is there ANYONE that DIDNT think about Hodges and Wendy would get together?

David "SuperDave" Phillips: No

Gregory Sanders: No

Mandy Webster: No

Sara Grissom: Sorry Henry, but Wendy and Hodges was like me and Gil. Inevidable

Gil Grissom: Thanks hon

Sara Grissom: You're welcome babe

Catherine Willows: =D


	11. Chapter 11

_This chapter is a bit weird. Its starts on facebook and delves into a conversation, kind of like the last one. A bit of GSR fluff in there too. If locating this is a problem, let me know and I'll put it back as a Iron Man story. _=D _The story about the cricket ball that comes up, thats actually a true story. It happened to me during cricket practise and it REALLY hurt, trashed a decent pair of shoes too. Trying it is NOT recommended._

_ENJOY!_

(...)

**Tony Stark wants a pony**

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: No

Tony Stark: Please? With a strawberry on top

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: No. I'm allegic

Steve Rogers: To the pony or the strawberry?

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Strawberry

Peter Parker: You never know, she could be allegic to Tony's ego

Tony Stark: Dont make me find the bug spray Peter

Sara Grissom: Pepper has worked for you for HOW LONG exactly? And you havent figured out that she ALLEGIC to strawberries?

Tony Stark: OF COURSE I know she's allegic to strawberries

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Only after I told you after you bought them AS AN APOLOGY

Gilbert Grissom: Buy flowers. They're easier, cheaper, last longer AND help express the feelings you cant put into words

Catherine Willow: Gil's a closet romantic. Who knew?

Sara Grissom: I did :P

Gregory Sanders: Only cause you were locked in the closet with him

**Gregory Sanders has been blocked by Sara Grissom**

_Nicky Stokes likes this_

Gregory Sanders: Its not funny dude

Nicky Stokes: You cant honestly think that saying something like that WONT get you in trouble

**Tony Stark thinks Gilbert Grissom is playing up the romance for his wife**

Gilbert Grissom: Sara likes lilacs, my mom's vegetarian lasagne, walking on the beach in the wet sand, surfing, extra crunchy peanut butter, mint choc chip ice cream and Doctor Who novels

Sara Grissom: =D Love you Gil

Gilbert Grissom: Love you too Sara

Tony Stark: Asking her is cheating Gil

Gilbert Grissom: Theres no way FOR me to cheat Tony

Tony Stark: ?

Gilbert Grissom: We're in different countries.

Catherine Willows: I can back that. Gil's in Paris and Sara's in Vegas

Tony Stark: How do you pull THAT off?

Gilbert Grissom: Not without difficulty

**Steve Rogers Tony Stark just got OWNED by Gilbert Grissom**

_54 people like this_

Peter Parker: Never question the married people Tony, they develop psychic powers when they exchange rings

Mary-Jane Watson: For someone who's never been married, you know a lot Pete

Peter Parker: Aunt May is a marriage encyclopedia

Albert Robbins: Couldnt have said that better myself and I've been married for 30 years

Gilbert Grissom: When did you start on facebook Al?

Albert Robbins: Catherine talked me into it. Its easier than trying to call you. Cheaper too.

**Gilbert Grissom wants his boss to DIE!**

Sara Grissom: What did he do now?

Gilbert Grissom: He wont give me any time off next month

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Whats next month?

Gilbert Grissom: Our anniversary

Tony Stark: B*stard!

Gilbert Grissom: You're telling me

**Tony Stark MAY have just kind of...broken Virginia "Pepper" Potts nose**

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Kind of my ass!

Steve Rogers: You hit Pepper? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!

Tony Stark: IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: YOU THREW A SPANNER AT ME!

Tony Stark: YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO CATCH IT!

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: YOU SHOULDNT BE THROWING TOOLS IN THE FIRST PLACE!

Peter Parker: WHY IS EVERYONE SHOUTING?

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts has just ensured that Tony Stark never has children**

_12 people like this_

Peter Parker: Ouch!

Steve Rogers: Huh?

Peter Parker: She kicked the family jewels

Steve Rogers: Ow!

**Harold Hogan is in stitches and cant breath**

Natasha Romanoff: I'm guessing your at Tony's?

Harold Hogan: You see his face! Its priceless!

"Happy? Please tell me you have a tissue?" Happy turned. Pepper was stood with a tone of tissue held against her nose, her white work blouse covered in blood.

"Holy...Pepper. Why didnt you tell me it was this bad?"

"I've only had a couple and they've never _been_ this bad."

"When was the last time you were hit with a spanner?"

"Never. I've been hit with a cricket ball though." Happy gave her a sceptical look. "My reflexes werent as good as they are now."

"Head back and pinch your nose."

"Dont get blood on the couch."

"Shut up Tony!" They both told him off

"_Sir, due to the amount of Miss Potts's blood loss, may I suggest taking her to the hospital?"_

"Right, yeah. JARVIS, could you please inform Natasha of where I am."

_"Of course sir."_

"I'm only gonna say this once Stark. If you're coming, ass. Car. Now."

"I dont like you as a hostile Happy."

"Now Tony!"


	12. Chapter 12

_OK so my little bro will be here in ten to steal my laptop. AGAIN! And apparently, dad just took mum to the hospital and I'm worried. I'll keep this as brief as possible. I've introduced Janet Pym aka Wasp, Tony and Pepper have broken up AGAIN and there's a lot of talk about sex, so be weery. I think thats about it. Is everyone else still getting ff alerts? Cause I'm not and am concerned. Let me know. If there are no comments, I'm assuming no one can find it and turning this back into an Iron Man fic, though its still technically Avengers/CSI. That wasnt brief at all, was it?_

_Who cares? People are losing their jobs and their coffees are going cold because they're hooked on my scribbles. I feel so special _:')

(...)

**Harold Hogan is tempted to lock Tony Stark in the trunk of his car**

_23 people like this_

Sara Grissom: Hows Pepper?

Harold Hogan: Light headed and probably gonna have a headache for a few days. Just waiting for the nurse with the release papers

Natasha Romanoff: I wanted to come but Fury HAD to have ANOTHER "you shouldnt be dating in the workplace" speech. He drilled out Peter too

Harold Hogan: Wasnt he seeing MJ BEFORE the Avengers happened?

Tony Stark: Guy probably gets turned on by making happy couples miserable. Probably have a go at me too

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts is single**

Tony Stark: Please be joking

Steve Rogers: How many times have they broken up now?

Bruce Banner: 9?

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: They're so busy breaking up, they probably havent had sex yet

Tony Stark: Thats none of your business

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: No, we havent

Tony Stark: PEPPER!

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: What? You want me to lie? Tell them we go at it like jack rabbits?

Tony Stark: Well, yeah

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: I'm too pissed at you to lie about our sex life

Steve Rogers: LOL

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: Tony Stark ISNT having sex? Dude, I'm suprised you aint suffering from withdrawal symtoms

Tony Stark: HA! So not funny

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: OMG! I just had a random thought. Happy Hogan is having more sex than Tony Stark. That should not be POSSIBLE!

Harold Hogan: 1) I am VERY offended 2) You shouldnt be thinking about MY sex life and 3) You bet your ASS I am!

Natasha Romanoff: Well put Happy

Harold Hogan: Thank you

**Gilbert Grissom wants to know why the HELL Harold Hogan's sex life is the topic of a discussion**

Harold Hogan: You really dont want to know

Tony Stark: Hows YOUR sex life Gil?

Gilbert Grissom: Clearly better than yours

Tony Stark: How is that possible? You're what? 80?

Gilbert Grissom: 53

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: Someone's jealous

Gilbert Grissom: I love my wife and thats all you need to know Stark

Sara Grissom: I love you too Gil

Gilbert Grissom: =D

Tony Stark: I hate you all

**JARVIS liked it better when Tony Stark and Virginia "Pepper" Potts were making out**

_15 people like this_

**Peter Parker is engaged to Mary-Jane Watson**

_32 people like this_

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: WHOOP! Bout time dude!

Peter Parker: Thanks Johnny, I think

Gilbert Grissom: Welcome to the rest of your life Pete. Dont do a Tony and screw it up

Tony Stark: HEY!

Peter Parker: MJ's the best thing in my life, apart from Aunt May. If I mess up, Natasha has permission to shoot me

Natasha Romanoff: Dont let it get that far, cause I dont miss

Peter Parker: *GULP* Scared of you

Natasha Romanoff: You should be

**Janet Pym has a headache**

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: You ok?

Janet Pym: Hank's trying to kill himself just to prove a point

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Where have I heard that one before?

Tony Stark: Oh Pepper, I knew you cared. Lets get married

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Try not doing stupid things like throwing spanners first. Until then, no

**Tony Stark has his tongue down Virginia "Pepper" Potts's throat**

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: Yeah right. Keep dreaming Stark

Harold Hogan: He actually does. In the middle of the ward, and people are starting to look

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: Lier

**Tony Stark and Virginia "Pepper" Potts were tagged in a photo**

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: OK, thats gross


	13. Chapter 13

_I know Logan's real name is James Howlett, but does anyone know what he changed his surname to? I left it as Howlett but I know that wrong. I obviously dont know X-Men very well. :S There are facts in here that I know to be TRUE and its quite sad that it is really. I have also shared my hatred of salted peanuts that arent actually salted. And a homicidal Pepper. I think that covers it_

XD

**(...)**

**Gilbert Grissom wishes the drunks would SHUT UP!**

**Tony Stark thinks Virginia "Pepper" Potts has FAR too many stilettos**

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: You have never have too many stilettos Tony

Tony Stark: You own more stilettos than I do individual socks

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Probably because they're under your bed being eaten by termites

Sara Grissom: Dont insult the termites, you'll upset Gil

Steve Rogers: Gil likes bugs?

Sara Grissom: Entomologist

Steve Rogers: Oh

Tony Stark: You know what an entomologist is Steve?

Steve Rogers: Google is very resourceful

Gilbert Grissom: They're called insects, not bugs

Steve Rogers: My bad

**Harold Hogan 650 children are abducted each year by their own family in Australia alone**

Peter Parker: Damn

Gilbert Grissom: Yeah

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts is married to Tony Stark**

Natasha Romanoff: When did THAT happen?

Tony Stark: Got me. I wasnt even there

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: I had Happy stand in for you

Tony Stark: WHAT!

Natasha Romanoff: WHAT!

Harold Hogan: WHAT!

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Happy's status was depressing, I was trying to brighten the mood. You should have seen your faces though

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts is in a relationship with Tony Stark**

**Tony Stark prefered it when he was married to Virginia "Pepper" Potts**

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts thinks we should wait more than a month before getting married**

Tony Stark: Thats not a flat no though

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Dont overthink it Tony, you'll hurt yourself

Peter Parker: Ouch

**Sara Grissom hates Gilbert Grissom and his stupid penis**

Catherine Willows: Oh my God!

Sara Grissom: Yeah

Tony Stark: Are you ALLOWED to use words like that on facebook?

Catherine Willows: Shut up Tony. Does Gil know?

Sara Grissom: Oh course he does! I'm not THAT pissed

**Gilbert Grissom is gonna be a daddy!**

_21 people like this_

Sara Grissom: Told you so

Gilbert Grissom: I thought you excited?

Sara Grissom: I was. Until I lost the ability to keep food in my stomach

Tony Stark: I really didnt need that visual Sara

Gilbert Grissom: School year ends in two weeks. I'll tell Lou to look for another Botany lectorer

Sara Grissom: What about the research grant?

Gilbert Grissom: You and the baby are more important than the bugs

Sara Grissom: I love you

Gilbert Grissom: I love you too

**Steve Rogers is suddenly feeling lonely**

_Tony Stark likes this_

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts is tempted to leave Tony Stark for Steve Rogers**

_Steve Rogers likes this_

Peter Parker: You so had that coming!

Tony Stark: Shove it spider boy

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: You've got us Steve, ignore gold-titanium boy

**Harold Hogan wants to know why his salted peanuts ARENT SALTED!**

Tony Stark: Stop buying cheap peanuts!

Harold Hogan: Not all of us are billionaires Tony

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts wants to know where the ice cream went**

James Rhodes: I may have eaten it last weekend. Sorry

**Tony Stark thinks James Rhodes is suicidal**

James Rhodes: Why?

Mary-Jane Watson: Everyone knows you NEVER eat Pepper's ice cream

Steve Rogers: I'm a super soldier and ice cream deprived Pepper scares the crap out of me

Logan Howlett: She tried to break my finger last time I did that

James Rhodes: Oh nuts

Tony Stark: Run and run hard

**James Rhodes is on the run from a homicidal Virginia "Pepper" Potts **


	14. Chapter 14

_More randomness for your viewing pleasure! I am literally running out of ideas and it took me about 3 hours to write this chapter. I'll try another tonight but I'm not making any promises. Theres more sex talk so tread carefully, k?_

**(...)**

**Sara Grissom WANTS THIS TO END!**

**Virginia "Pepper" Potts has decided she's never having sex with Tony Stark because Sara Grissom makes pregnancy sound like having root canal**

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: If you listen really hard, you can probably hear Tony's balls shrinking

Peter Parker: Its perverce that you would even THINK about that Johnny

Tony Stark: I'll stock up on condoms

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: You know damn well they arent foolproof

Tony Stark: I'll wear SEVEN CONDOMS!

Gilbert Grissom: Please stop having this conversation

Tony Stark: Its NOT having this converation that put a bun in your wife's oven

Sara Grissom: Yeah, but we're having sex which is HOW I got pregnant

**Tony Stark hates BOTH Grissoms**

Johnny "TheHumanTorch" Storm: One day you will learn not to start unwinable fights Tony

Tony Stark: One day you'll learn to keep your mouth shut

**Harold Hogan is engaged to Natasha Romanoff**

_84 people like this_

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Elope and I kill both of you

Natasha Romanoff: Dont worry Pepper, we're not that mean

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: coughgilandsaracough

Sara Grissom: Saw that

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: Glad to see pregnancy hasnt impaired your vision

Sara Grissom: Go to hell Virginia

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: XP

**Sara Grissom thinks NOT having sex is messing with Virginia "Pepper" Potts's head**

Tony Stark: HA! Even the pregnant one thinks we should have sex

Gilbert Grissom: Will you PLEASE leave my wife alone?

Virginia "Pepper" Potts: She started it

**Sara Grissom Gilbert Grissom THE BABY DOESNT LIKE PEANUT BUTTER!**

Tony Stark: Thats not good is it?

Gilbert Grissom: No, thats very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very bad

Tony Stark: Good luck with the next 6 months

Gilbert Grissom: I may need an unarmed version of the Iron Man suit. Sara cant eat peanut butter and I fear for my life

Tony Stark: Wear a cup?

Gilbert Grissom: I can live without THAT! I fear for my liver and kidneys

Tony Stark: What about your head?

Gilbert Grissom: I have a crash helmet somewhere

Tony Stark: LOL

**Steve Rogers suddenly feels the pressing need to stay single**

Gilbert Grissom: Having companionship isnt ALWAYS a bad thing. Just try not to get one with a shoe fetish though

Virginia Pepper Potts: OI!

Sara Grissom: Gil, we're not out of chips

Gilbert Grissom: Top shelf of the pantry

Sara Grissom: Thank you baby

Gilbert Grissom: Please try not to get crumbs in the keys. Archie's gonna start charging me to fix it.

**Conrad Ecklie wants to know why there's a tarantula in is his office**

Nicky Stokes: Crap

Gilbert Grissom: Nick?

Nicky Stokes: I kind of lost Stevey

Gilbert Grissom: You FOUND Stevey?

Nicky Stokes: I was supposed to tell Sara but Cath distracted me. I didnt realise he'd gone missing again

Gilbert Grissom: If he squashes my tarantula Nick...

Nicky Stokes: Doubt it. Ecklie just ran down the corridor. Screaming.

Archie Johnson: I already sent everyone the video and its on youtube AND facebook

Gilbert Grissom: You're a legend Archie. I can hear Sara laughiing in here

Archie Johnson: Heads up, Ecklie just had Judy call an exterminator.

Gilbert Grissom: NICK!

**Nicky Stokes Operation Save Stevie is a go!**

Steve Rogers: Whos Stevie?


	15. Chapter 15

_Thats it. My mind is completely blank, which is why this is shorter than usual and I cant figure out why I'm so tired. SHopping is the devil. Got work tomorrow so maybe I'll find inspiration. Who knows. I'm still unsure about what happened yesterday but my mum is fine and I thank all of you who voiced your concern._

=D

(...)

**Tony Stark wants ribs**

Virginia Pepper Potts: Great! I ordered pizza

Tony Stark: Spoil sport

Virginia Pepper Potts: =D

Sara Grissom: Please dont talk about food

Virginia Pepper Potts: I thought the morning sickness was over

Gilbert Grissom: She misses her peanut butter.

Virginia Pepper Potts: Poor Sara :'(

**Johnny TheHumanTorch Storm PEPPERONI!**

Gilbert Grissom: 1. You cant spell 2. STOP TALKING ABOUT FOOD INFRONT OF SARA!

Johnny TheHumanTorch Storm: I just had a thought. If you take the T off Tony, change the Y for an I and stick it to the end of Pepper, you get Pepperoni!

Gilbert Grissom: Oh Yeah!

Tony Stark: That is SO not funny

Peter Parker: AWW! Tony and Pepper are the new Brangelina

Steve Rogers: Sounds like a dodgy wine label

Peter Parker: Its Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt's names mashed together

Steve Rogers: Still sounds like a dodgy wine label

Peter Parker: LOL

**Natasha Romanoff wants to know where the hell her fiance is and is looking at Tony Stark**

JARVIS: Mr Hogan is currently unconcious on Mr Stark's couch

Natasha Romanoff: What the hell happened?

JARVIS: Mr Stark did not learn his lesson and threw a wrench at Mr Hogan

Natasha Romanoff: TONY! WHAT THE HELL!

Virginia Pepper Potts: He's alright. He's lucky he doesnt have a concussion

**Tony Stark is on the run**

**Natasha Romanoff is going to KILL Tony Stark if he sets foot on land again**

**Sara Grissom wishes Conrad Ecklie would p*ss off so I can get some sleep**

Catherine Willows: Bet you wish Ecklie could experience pregnancy huh?

Sara Grissom: Eh! Dont put THOSE images in my head. Damn it child WHY CANT YOU LIKE PEANUT BUTTER?

Gilbert Grissom: Shouting at your stomach wont make our child like peanut butter honey

Sara Grissom: Can it Gilbert

Gilbert Grissom: Yes dear

Tony Stark: TOLD!

Gilbert Grissom: At least Sara hasnt come at me with a gun yet

Gregory Sanders: TOLD!

**Conrad Ecklie wants to know why Sara Grissom isnt picking up her phone**

Gilbert Grissom: We've been over this Conrad. The chemicals CSIs use are dangerous for the baby.

Sara Grissom: I have a medical certificate and I cleared it with Catherine over A MONTH AGO!

Gilbert Grissom: Why is Wendy in the field yet? I gave her recommendation over a year ago

Conrad Ecklie: With Hodges on swing, I need her in the lab

Gilbert Grissom: I have one word on this matter. BULLSH*T!

**Conrad Ecklie has been blocked by Gilbert Grissom**

**Conrad Ecklie has been blocked by Sara Grissom **


	16. Chapter 16

_I'm still tryin'. I'm thinking about getting a second part-time job as a boredom buster. I've bust my knee AGAIN, and I'm planning an attempt at another chapter of Let It Go just because I hate that its not finished. PLEASE check it out, I'll smile even more than I do when people read this. I'll even try another chapter of this if it motivates people. _:) _I'd hope that the positive overcomes the negative._

(...)

**Virginia Pepper Potts knew this was a bad idea**

Sara Grissom: oh no

Virginia Pepper Potts: Not THAT! Peter thinks he has a high stomach tolerance and Steve decided to prove him wrong

Sara Grissom: EW!

Tony Stark: Oh, I'm going vegetarian

Sara Grissom: Dont even joke about that Tony

Tony Stark: Who says I was?

Virginia Pepper Potts: I'd give you a week. You'd miss Burger King too much

Tony Stark: The little faith you have in me hurts Pepper

Virginia Pepper Potts: XD

**Tony Stark is going to be sick**

Virginia Pepper Potts: In the bucket Tony

Tony Stark: Do we have any mouth wash?

Virginia Pepper Potts: Right next to the toothbrush you obviously arent using

Tony Stark: Thanks Pep

Virginia Pepper Potts: Brush your teeth Tony or I'm staying in the spare room

**Tony Stark is cleaning his teeth**

_Virginia Pepper Potts likes this_

**Peter Parker isnt feeling so good **

Virginia Pepper Potts: Told it was a bad idea

Peter Parker: It was TOTALLY worth it

Steve Rogers: I still kicked your ass Bug boy

Gilbert Grissom: HEY!

Steve Rogers: Sorry Gil

**Logan Howlett thinks relationships are overrated**

Gilbert Grissom: They're not THAT bad

Logan Howlett: Are you kidding me?

Gilbert Grissom: Dont use Tony and Pepper as an example. Look at Happy and Natasha

Logan Howlett: I'd rather not. They're making out again

Gilbert Grissom: XD

**Sara Grissom misses her feet**

Catherine Willows: Just think about it though. In a few months, it'll all be worth it

Sara Grissom: I know, its the waiting thats killing me

Gilbert Grissom: I have ice cream!

Sara Grissom: I love you

Gilbert Grissom: No, you love the ice cream

Sara Grissom: I love you for BRINGING the ice cream

Gilbert Grissom: *Shrugs* I can live with that

Gregory Sanders: AH! True love at its finest

Sara Grissom: You bet your ass it is!

Gilbert Grissom: XP

Hank Pettigrew: O.o

Nicky Stokes: Dont ask, its something singles and retards wouldnt understand

Gregory Sanders: BOOYAH!

**Peter Parker Is there a smudge on my keyboard or a smudge on my eye?**

_4 people like this_

Logan Howlett: What the hell have you been smoking?

Steve Rogers: I'm with Logan, thats weird, even for you Pete

Peter Parker: Jamerson has had me staring at my computer screen for the past six hours. My eyes keep crossing

Mary-Jane Watson: You want some coffee?

Peter Parker: Anymore coffee and I wont sleep for a week

Sara Grissom: Try being a pregnant insomniac. Its not fun

Gilbert Grissom: Try being married to said pregnant insomniac

Peter Parker: Care to dig yourself out of a hole?

Gilbert Grissom: Sara cant drink coffee, which means I cant drink coffee. Add to the fact that the baby doesnt like peanut butter...

Peter Parker: Hell in a hand basket

Gilbert Grissom: You're words not mine

**Tony Stark is hanging by a moment here with you**

_Virginia Pepper Potts likes this_

Sara Grissom: I LOVE that song!

**Johnny TheHumanTorch wants to have sex baby**

Tony Stark: And there goes the moment. Thanks Johnny


	17. Chapter 17

_I'm calling this the last chapter, but knowing me I'll end up writing a sequel. A bit shorter than normal but I didnt know what else to do. I'll get some more ideas together and see how I go. I'm actually tempted to write an IM (Instant Message not Iron Man) fic, who knows?_

_For your viewing pleasure, I present the final chapter of Facebook_

;P

(...)

**Tony Stark likes ike.**

**Virginia Pepper Potts really wants Tony Stark to stop watching Indiana Jones**

**Sara Grissom is fat**

Gilbert Grissom: You're not fat you're pregnant and you're beautiful and I love you

Sara Grissom: You dont want to sleep on the couch

Gilbert Grissom: I'd love you if you were purple with green pokadots

Tony Stark: Thanks for that visual Gil

Gilbert Grissom: Can it Stark

**Natasha Romanoff thinks Harold Hogan looks like an overcooked lobster**

Harold Hogan: Thanks hon

Tony Stark: No sunscreen?

Natasha Romanoff: Nope

Tony Stark: Pepper falls pray to that every time.

Harold Hogan: Guys, this really hurts!

Virginia Pepper Potts: Use Alo and dont scratch, it makes it more painful

Harold Hogan: Thank you Pepper. At least SOMEONE cares.

Natasha Romanoff: I'll rub lotion on your back

Harold Hogan: =D

Tony Stark: What is it with you people and mental images?

**Tony Stark I'm young and I'm hopeless**

Sara Grissom: I'm lost and I know this

Sara Grissom: I think my water just broke

Tony Stark: They're not the lyrics

Sara Grissom: No dickweed MY WATER JUST BROKE!

Tony Stark: oh. O.o

Tony Stark: WHAT!

Gilbert Grissom: Bags by the door, Catherine'll be there in ten minutes.

Tony Stark: Where the hell are you?

(...)

In her twenty years of medical experience, Nurse Michela could honestly say that the waiting room of Desert Palm had never been in such disarrey before this partiular night. A strawberry blond was swearing high and low at an intern because he couldnt fond the right paper work, Tony Stark and Pepper Potts had shown up not longer after the patient had been shown to her room, Tony supporting a rather heavy nose bleed while Pepper attempted to ignore him and fix her frazzled hair, three men, one of them covered in something she wouldnt attempt to guess at, arrived, claiming to be the patient's brothers. Finally, an hour later, the husband had shown up, completely drenched from the sudden down pour only to collapse from exhaustion, having apparently run most of the way after his car got a flat.

"I cant do this any more!" Pepper ran a cool cloth over Sara's sweat drenched forehead. "Where the hell is Gil?"

"Nick's still trying to wake him up."

"Remind me when this is over, I'm loping off his penis."

"Please dont."

"Where the hell have you been? And why are you wet?"

"Its raining and my car got a flat." Gil rushed to her side as another contraction

"I dont like this. Gil I dont like this."

"I know honey." He placed a kiss in her hair. "Just keep going, you're doing great."

His words were cut off by another scream, this time followed by a wail.

(...)

**Gilbert Grissom is proud to announce that Michael Warrick Grissom is 3.7 pounds. Both mother and son are healthy**

_97 people like this_

**Fini**


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